i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
