Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
