i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize