I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
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