I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
3 2 1 whiskey
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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