the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize