4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
