i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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