Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize