did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
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I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
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Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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