If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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