Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I could fuck to npr.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Randomize
