Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize
