What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
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