let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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