Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
you never un-have a 4some
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
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