At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
