think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Randomize