South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
