remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Randomize