If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
