Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!