I want to stick my p in your. b.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
