My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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