I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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