My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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