your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
