Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
