well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
