New invention idea: vibrating tampons
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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