he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
