He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
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I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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