i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
