just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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