Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
