quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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