fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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