i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Sext me about skeletons
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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