We're facebook friends in real life
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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