the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
