what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
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Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
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