If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
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