So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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