did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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