we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
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