Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
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