On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
