I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
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