Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
