But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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